klytamnestra's world!!!!

4:50PM - Birthday Bliss!!

I had a wonderful birthday. It began last weekend with one of Lady Blackwell’s annual soiree’s, saluting the milestones of Bruce, Robert and I. George made a fuss over the invitation which spelled out that there wouldn’t be any presents for George. Two days later he was opening one from Amazon and was muttering “I wish Robert could see me now!” No matter. It was a very mellow evening with drinks, candlelight, and Patti Lupone singing show music. I left out the lemon cake and the strawberry mousse pie. And the oxtail and chicken for the first course. It really was about the ambiance, catching up on each other’s lives on a lovely night.

Chuck and John sent their card a week early. Much fun. A picture of a cat gambling with cards, and questioning how old are you this year. Like the army, dear. Don’t ask. Don’t tell. I think it’s gone up to 29 this year, and holding. Holding on for as long as possible. Ian was the first to wish me well on Facebook. A week early. Then came Heather a day early. Then it was Everybody Else on Facebook!!! Some I hear from regularly. Some a breath of fresh air! Oh my gawd! It was all wonderful! Got to the office and Robin wouldn’t let me sit down. He had a couple of fun cards, one from him and Trissie, another from Everyone in our department. Plus a dvd set of Hart To Hart! I’ve been catching up on the tv series I never watched because I didn’t have a VCR when they came out, and I’m a fan of detective/murder shows. Lately it’s been Moonlighting, but Robert Wagner should be pretty easy on the eyes, and Stephanie Powers looks brighter than any of Charlie’s Angels. (I’m gonna get slapped for that one!) Barb called from Markham to wish me a happy. Amanda had these nice cheese croissants she and her daughter had made, and apologized there wasn’t a cake. That’s truly okay. I’m quite happy with the folk I work with and that’s just fine. I departed for Swiss Chalet and when I came back, Amanda shouted out HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I turned around, and she was holding this wonderful Farmville Cake, covered on top with trees, chickens, cows, horses and other playthings! It made me smile. I’m hoping to post a picture of it shortly.

This is all out of order. Bruce gave me two vintage magazines of what men who like men might have been looking at in the 60’s which are fascinating. That’s probably all I can say right now. I need to sit down and enjoy them. Robert gave me a Spring Awakening Fridge Magnet (there really is a fridge somewhere underneath) for my kitchen, a collector’s sheet of Bette Davis stamps looking her All About Eve best, a Broadway calendar I can enjoy all next year with Angela on the cover…and last but not least, my very first Barbie Doll. A collector’s doll of Barbie dressed as Melanie Daniels from Alfred Hitchcock’s THE BIRDS. There’s a bird attacking her pulled back blond hair. There’s a bird on her shoulder pecking at her and another at her waist! Utterly divine! I will find a place of honour for it.

11:20AM - a day at the opera/a night at the musical...

     I went to see the much ballyhooed production of TOSCA at the Met.  Okay, it was my local cineplex.  New year, new schtick.  Since I had reserved seating, I showed up about ten minutes before the performance.  Only to discover a line up of about 200 people waiting to get in.  The line was moving, it just took awhile.  I was happy to learn that the beginning of the opera was delayed for ten minutes for "technical problems".  They also announced the sun might disrupt the broadcast and begged for our patience.  LUckily that never happened.  The simulcast was being held in three separate theatres.  I also used my SCENE card to get a discount on the frozen yoghurt at one of the intermissions.  The only way to get that is to leave right at the end of one of the intermissions.  Otherwise you're risking you might not be through the line-up in time, and I didn't want to miss a single aria. 

    Most of the anger came from the replacement of the mega-buck Franco Zefferelli production.  Act one takes place in a beautiful cathedral.  Well, that was the last version.  This church still looks like it's first painting is being created while we watch.  There's no altar or pews.  I can see why people are grousing if they're used to the previous version.  I just concentrated on the singing.  The opera starts with a man seeking refuge in the church.  He's escaped from a penetentiary, and has arranged with his sister to pick up a disguise in the family chapel area so he can flee town.  Meanwhile, the local artisan Cavaradossi is trying to finish his portrait of the Madonna, who actually resembles the local diva Tosca who's been spending a lot of time in church lately praying for her own reasons--an unrequited love for Cavaradossi.  Tosca is a diva, and as she sings offstage, I can't help remembering Bernadette Peters in Terrence McNally's THE LAST MILE which was written to commemorate an anniversary for Great Performances.  The opera diva Tosca is played by Karita Mattila, who's 49 years old and not the youthful Bernadette Peters.  The role calls for someone who's easily jealous, and not the brightest bulb on the christmas tree.  I would have gone for a much younger actress. 

    Anyway, the singing is fabulous and Very Verissimo, as they kept saying backstage.  It's true to the spirit and the meaning.  The hero and the villain both could easily lose about 100 pounds.  Yes, since the opera diva's have been kvetched  at for their backstage love of cheesecake, it's time to turn the tables on the tenors and baritones.  Actually, the villain, Scarpio kind of suits the size.  Maybe he's meant to be as big as Brutus or Stromboli as the crooked police chief, and seeing a naked boob and the back of someone's butt during a menage a quatre on the couch was enough to turn on any opera goer.  There were two large couches that made me remember Kherman and Ellen's couch, also red and oversized.  Kherman got his from EATONS.  I've always loved it.  It's got room for about four people to sit down on easily.  Yes, you can complain about the sets, but I loved the furniture.  Can't wait for the orgy sequence from the upcoming TALES OF HOFFMAN.  Hey, we all bring our own agenda to the opera. 

     I also found the last three seconds of the opera something of a cheat.  TOSCA isn't over until the diva hurls herself off the parapet.  This one ends before you can say SPLAT!  THe lights go out and it's left to our imagination....I suspect someone pushed an oversized muppet.  Still, I went in expecting to be bitterly disappointed, and it was perfectly acceptable.  Maybe it's because I saw that COC production of MacBeth that seemed to be set in LEON'S Furniture Warehouse that I'm more accepting. 

     Continued on my way and bought a turkey for Thanksgiving.  "Don't come home without one!"  were the last words Woolly said to me, in a threatening way.  I complied.  I also bought the grass hopper pie that was on sale for $4.00.  Earlier in the week, Woolly said the rare words, "I feel like watching a musical this weekend...."   He even suggested THE KING AND I.  Back up to Robert who loaned me both his collector's version of THE KING AND I and SOUTH PACIFIC.  About three months ago.  Maybe longer.  I like to give them back promptly.  He also loaned us his entire TEXAS CHAINSAW oeuvre.  As Dolores Gray sang in IT"S ALWAYS FAIR WEATHER..."Thanks, but no thanks!"  However, I hope to have those returned sometime soon. 

George agreed to watch SOUTH PACIFIC.  I didn't tell him, but I made him watch the Road Show edition which had extra bits put back into it.  I'd never seen them before.  I was grateful and together we made it through THREE HOURS of SOUTH PACIFIC.  George knew some of the songs but didn't know how they fit in context to the show.  It was a very interactive viewing.  I stopped him from snoring at every opportunity.  He did close his eyes at the beginning of BALI HAI and by the end when I woke him, he had no idea how long he'd been asleep.  I didn't pour water over his head during I'm Gonna Wash That Man Right Out Of My Hair, but the thought DID enter my mind.  We poked each other during YOUNGER THAN SPRINGTIME and GAYER THAN LAUGHTER.  And George will always be my Three Hundred and One Pounds Of Fun, that's my great big HONEY BUN!    Anyway, it was definitely Some Enchanted Evening.....

10:16AM - getting down on the farm....

     For a while this summer, I was working on Salim's garden.  Clearing away the occasional seven foot weed and living in fear of the groundhog who seems to have moved in.  To quote Patricia Neal in BREAKFAST AT TIFFANY'S, " Looks like love has found Andy Hardy...".  Suddenly his spare time was devoted to a lady he met through Facebook and she came 3000 miles across an ocean for more than just a spot of tea.  What was I going to do in the meantime?  Yeah, I could start the story like this.  Maybe it starts much earlier...
     When I was just a kid, one of those questions that people used to ask:  "What do you want to do when you grow up?"  That's what Uncle Bill used to ask on Tiny Talent Time, and my stock answer was always "I want to be a farmer".  Easy enough for a city boy to say, growing up watching BEWITCHED and LOST IN SPACE.  The actual experience was pony rides in the summer before we got too big for them, maybe a trip to Center Island's farm once or twice, and maybe a visit to the Royal Winter Fair.  The truth was I was fairly small and animals terrified me.  Even houses that had dogs got assigned to my brother when I helped him on his paper route.  If I read THE EDIBLE WOMAN one more time, I'd probably stop eating meat altogether.  Still, I buy my meat products in styrofoam at the grocery store and don't think about the Before picture.  The image of the farm is still fairly appealing with healthy crops and cows and chickens if you eliminate the thought they end up in some slaughter house.  
 
     Update to last month.  Or did it start before that?  A co-worker joined this application called FARMVILLE on Facebook.  She kept saying things like "Someone just sent me a cow!"  "Just look at my beautiful lemon tree!"  "Oh dear, my strawberries have wilted!"  She'd intersperse our regular dialogue with updates and most of us would giggle.  She wasn't alone.  There were others who were budding farmers.  It turns out to be one of Facebooks most active applications.  Within three weeks, I decided to join the Green Acres folks and started my own farm on Happy Valley.  You plant a few crops, go back later and harvest them and you get coins to buy more seeds and then you harvest them and along the way you get rewarded with extra "coins" and "points" and fun things pop up along the way like giant balloons (Dorothy, I wanna go home...)  ugly ducklings and elephants.  Okay, I'm still trying to figure out the elephants, but maybe we can get them to pull out tree trunks eventually. 

    You click on the farm animals you collect and they give milk or fur or eggs or whatever, and you get more points/coins.  You can develop your farm, make neighbours, do helpful errands for your neighbours.  It's been a fun experience.  Each farm tells you something about each neighbour as to how they want to run their farm.  One gal isnt' really into the crops and has lots of animals and fruit trees instead and she's just fine.  Others like to organize their farms in neat rows of corn interspersed with pineapples and carrots.  Okay, these aren't the kind of farms you're going to see in reality, but you figured that out after the elephants.  There are fun elements, like the sound effects button you can choose to turn on, and you'll hear the sounds of horses neighing and cows mooing.  And yes, George, unmistakably the sound of PIGS.  And Sheep.  Someone turned on the sound effects at one point and it was a hoot.   George thinks I've joined the funny farm, and it has been something of an obsession.  This is the only time I will ever grow Tomatoes.  They grow in eight hours while I'm asleep and then I can get up with the sun and harvest them.  Rice is kind of nice--it turns the farm into this blue lagoon!  

    Anyway, I want to credit Katie who's been my advisor with farming advice.  I still need to know how to take my prize winning squash to the Royal Winter Fair....If you haven't heard from me lately, it's because I've been down on the farm....

1:57PM - about JENNIFER, short and not so sweet...

JENNIFER”S BODY 

Currently on display at a Cineplex near you, but I’m not sure how long it’s gonna be available….

   This may not be one of the worst movies ever made, but it’s the worst movie I’ve seen all year. As Paul Lynde sang in BYE BYE BIRDIE, “what’s the matter with Kids today?” .   Well, I know we weren’t perfect in every way, but the kids talk like Jarvis Street hookers and they’re maybe sixteen. Early on in this film, Jennifer talks about NOT being a backwards virgin and that she had to “Sit on a package of frozen peas” the next day to recover. WTF??!!   This is a movie about members of a young rock band who decides to sacrifice a virgin named Jennifer in the moonlight. Guess what—she ain’t a virgin, and things go terribly wrong. Jennifer becomes a female weirwolf or vampire who has to chase young men into the woods and eat them when she’s feeling peckerish. I’m all for going into the woods to get your wish. It’s Sondheim! It’s practically Disney. I remember the scene of Princess Aurora frolicking in the woods with Prince Charming in SLEEPING BEAUTY. This movie definitely ups the ante with the cute little forest creatures. I feel terribly old. Whatever happened to Frankie and Annette? Light years away. 

    Jennifer’s best friend is named Needy. Short for Anita. She must be very “needy” . Needy’s boyfriend doesn’t look old enough to be having sex, but don’t tell Paul Lynde. This film is from the people who brought you JUNO, which was about a pregnant teenager, so at least we got to see that one first. This is supposed to be a scary movie with comedic touches. At one point, Jennifer gets speared with a long pole and it goes right through her stomach.   She pulls it out. She’ll feel a draft, from fore to aft! Jennifer  blithely asks, “You have a tampon?” .

    Just saying….

8:21AM - "do you remember what year you made that picture?"

     I was a stage star once.  For about two minutes.  If that.  All those years of  operettas and community chorus appearances didn't do it.  No, I had this walk-on role in Fruit Cocktail 1987, and it got a lot of attention.  People wrote into newspapers complaining about it.  People wrote back defending it.  It's all over now, and somewhere I have a VHS tape of the experience. 
     George was a star once, too.  On television.  Okay, one commercial.  His commercial for EATONS netted him about $4,000 for one day's work.  He got picked up in a limousine, he stood at a bus stop and had maybe six lines.  It played nationally on television for the launch of Hugo Boss perfume.  I actually remember seeing it a few times.  By the time I fell in love with him, I didn't connect him with the commercial.  Tha t was about twelve years ago.  A lot of water under the bridge since then.   I was hoping to find it on YouTube, but it's not there.  Sigh...
    So Saturday night, we two has-beens are sitting on the couch.  Watching guess what movie?  WHATEVER HAPPENED TO BABY JANE. About a washed up stage star and a forgotten film star.  Sisters!  Sisters!  There were never such devoted sisters!   Living together, growing old together. It puts new meaning to the phrase "Star Wars!"   Jane imitates Blanche's voice.  Jane tries to freak out Blanche when she serves the dinner.  Jane kicks Blanche in the ribs."   All this after a horrible car accident in the film's second prologue.   This is too familiar.  I think I know these people.  Even Elvira the maid.  Think she worked here once or twice.  At the point when Blanche is desperately hungry, and starts eating stale chocolates from Jane's drawers, George suddenly remembers the peppermint patties in a tin can left over from that Chocolate Monopoly game a few weeks back....
      It's not quite a musical, though you get to hear "I've Written A Letter To Daddy" about three times.  "His address is heaven above!!!".  I remember singing that one at TRAX more times than I care to remember.  Also known at Bette Davis' big song hit, right up there with "They're Either Too Young or Too Old..."  and  "Hush Hush, Sweet Charlotte!"   She actually released a record album, Bette Davis Sings!  Of course we knew!  The film also "introduced"  Victor Buono, who is probably better known as King Tut on BATMAN's 60's tv series.  Not sure what else he did.  One of the Planet of the Apes movies and a cannibal movie called THE MAD BUTCHER and scattered tv appearances and he never married.  He also died relatively young.   We need to give up the ice cream.  And now you know that two has-beens sit around on Saturday night watching old Bette Davis and/or Joan Crawford movies...
I

7:32AM - update...

     Well, I'm trying to keep writing, but what if there's not too much to write about?  We finished with RHODA's box this week.  "Hello, this is Carlton your doorman...."  which must have been used as a tired gag in EVERY show.   Can't believe how young Julie Kavner was in the beginning, who went on to THE SIMPSONS, then appearances in Woody Allen movies and TRACEY TAKES ON.  Also it's kind of sad that the actor who played Joe has now gone to join Nancy Walker Up There....Anyway, I think everyone agrees that Rhoda lost her edge (jumped the proverbial shark) once she got married....I don't know if there will be a second box release.  Or if we'll ever see a box release of PHYLLIS.  I do have the 5th season of MTM to look forward to this fall, so they've really taken their sweet time getting those out. One thing I'll say, the Rhodas wedding one hour episode was very very funny.  

    What else did we watch since I last wrote?  Another viewing of DEAD MAN WALKING, which I hadn't seen since the theatre's release.  Interesting to see one of the supporting characters from DEXTER in the cast.  It's also interesting to re-watch it once you know the final outcome of the movie.  Did he or didn't he?  Followed that with MAMMA MIA which also made me cry again and I don't know why.  I woke up the next morning with those Abba tunes racing around in my head, and I still believe that Pierce Brosnan can't really sing and a lot of it doesn't really work,but I'm looking at the beautiful scenery and singing along with the words at the bottom of the screen and having a great time....George of course knew most of the song lyrics...

     I also finished watching IOLANTHE from a few weeks back.  Again I was haunted with song lyrics for two days afterwards which I don't know how to eliminate, so I probably need to watch another musical fast.  There's THE BIG GAY MUSICAL coming out on the big screen shortly,but I imagine it's only likely to play the Carlton--it's the movie version of AdAM AND STEVE which I also saw once upon a time...

    Work was crazy this week--I was only there for three days, and had to do my job plus a coworkers.  I've been watching a lot of HOTEL episodes in between.  Lots of drama and familiar faces.  Also saw the episode of Charlie's Angels where the copilot and the pilot were drugged, andthere was only Kelly left to fly and land the plane full of stewardesses!  Now we're moving on to the last season of BEWITCHED.  I could be doing the film festival, but have you checked out the film prices?  I can wait... Yeah, I know this is very tv oriented, but frankly, there isn't a lot of news....

8:06AM - trying not to labour on labour day....

   I think Labour Day is one of those holidays Americans share with us.  They celebrate theirs with a Jerry Lewis telethon, and we celebrate ours by keeping the Eaton Center open.  Work was especially kind on Friday.  The VP sent an email saying if you had completed all your time sensitive work and had the approval of your manager, you could leave at 2pm.  It was sent around 1:30, and it took me until 2:30 to hit the trail, but it felt like getting out of school for summer!  Stopped at METRO, formerly Dominion to get George his Sweet And Low.  Artificial Sweetener.  Last time it was on sale,and I bought two boxes.  Now we're nearly out,and no other brand will suffice.  Then stopped at Loblaws to get a decent sized bottle of pure maple syrup.  Can't see buyingone of those watered down Aunt Jemima's...Made it home with two extra hours to put my feet up and it felt good.  George picked up dinner at Steve's and we watched an episode of RHODA  "My name is Rhoda Morgenstern.  I was born in the Bronx in December, 1941.  I still feel responsible for World War 2.  The only thing I ever loved that loved me back was food."  etcetera etcetera etcetera... Did we watch another episode of Charlie's Angels?  I forget what I did, but I still feel like I'm being punished. 

   No.  It comes back and stalks my memory.  We watched the remake of HALLOWEEN.  Lots of attention to the pre-story about little Micheal Myers and his trailer trash family who eventually get slaughtered by this eight (?) year old boy.  Sent to an asylum where he's visited by Dr. Loomis, now played by Malcolm McDowell (who's still atoning for his sins from A CLOCKWORK ORANGE).  Eventually more carnage, and Michael is left for dead (???) in the bottom of a drained swimming pool.  For the record, this is not what you want for a bedtime story.  I woke up early the next morning and didn't want to go back to sleep. 

    It was a Shoppers Drug Mart 20 times the Points day, and we were almost out of bubble bath.  It happens.  I took a short bus ride with my two IKEA plastic bags, and bought six more bottles--one of each flavour (?  we don't actually drink the stuff) plus Listerine on sale, and Q-Tips for something to stick in my ears besides fingers when I don't want to hear people scream.  I bought products that had special labels like 5 times the regular points.  I bought two more bottles of dish soap.  Again different flavours.  We have no product loyalty, and switch from Palmolive to Sunlight without guilt.  Just like the refreshing smell of something nice when water is filling the sink.  My regular points added up to about 1,000, plus another 1,000 points for buying certain bonus products.  Multiply that by 20.  Anyway, I can now have a good shopping spree for free next time.  When we run low on SDM stuff...Wait six months...

     Rushed back for a cup of George's terrific coffee and sat down with the Saturday paper.  Then we left for the bus stop.  Ran into Darlene and Alex who were also going downtown.  She's become something of a groupie for one of the buskers, but they ended up going for a long long walk instead.  George went for coffee with a Good Book.  I went to the opera.  LA BOHEME.  At the Cineplex.  I'm becoming a big fan.  I saw La Boheme in April when the COC did it and four months later, I'm willing to see it again--which must prove it.  This is the Met version...which means it's the biggest possible. 

   I enjoyed it well enough.  I like being upclose and personal--I usually sit in the front because I can't stand the seniors muttering to themselves in the dark near me.  Rodolfo was definitely portly,and there was another of his cotillion who was twice the size of him.  It was hard to believe in this group as starving artists.  Still the crowded street scene for act two was incredible--I always thought the COC did an incredible job with this opera but the Met must have a bigger stage and more $!    Musetta is definitely a great name for a feline pet!! 
Afterwards, I killed time checking out the dvd ghetto of Yonge/Dundas and ran into Robert who was killing time after checking out two movies at AMC.  We went up and joined George (who was early?!!) for HALLOWEEN 2. 

     HALLOWEEN 2.   What can I say?  It continues the story after Micheal is found dead inside the swimming pool.  Laurie is picked up by the Sherriff wandering around in shock and covered in blood.  Yes, everything's as if we never said goodbye.  And Michael never dies...This time, they've added a mother fixation for Michael, and she keeps reappearing in halluciinations with a white horse.  What the ????  I'm happy that Malcolm McDowell is still back in the story.  It's suddenly a year later and he's on the talk show circuit pushing his latest book about the Michael Myers legend.  The movie redeems itself with an appearance by Lois Lane (i mean MARGOT KIDDER) as a psychiatrist.  Robert gave the movie a 3--I gave it a 5, George gave it an 8 and can't wait for the video.  Maybe it will come out in time for Halloween!!!  
    We followed the movie with dinner at the Pickle Barrel.  Iain joined us.  He sat through one version of Halloween and had had enough, years ago.  I envy a man who knows when to say when.  Nice dinner.  George stopped off at Indigo to pick up the latest Star Wars novel--he wanted it YESTERDAY!!  He also picked up the Peanuts dvd with ITS THE GREAT PUMPKIN, CHARLIE BROWN which we had to watch as soon as we got home...

     Sunday we got up and went to the Ex with Darlene, Alex and Vivienne.  A good time, but much the same experience as a year ago.  Tiny Tom donuts of course.  The farm building to see Yoda and Jabba the Hut in Butter amongst other creations.  Like butta!  The arts and crafts building.  george bought some jams, some nut brittle.  I bought four books.  Word to the wise--NEVER BUY BOOKS at the CNE.  Or at least until closing time.  You carry them around all day and your arms grow longer.  George also bought some chocolate body butta.  If you see George looking like Jabba the Hutt and all brown, yes, that's probably him.  wait five years.  I'm going to be hit hard for that one.  OUCHHHHHHHHH

    The food building.  George did Shopsy's which I think is now defunct as a restaurant in Toronto.  I did H SALT Fish And Chips.  Also long defunct.  The CNE celebrates the ghosts of restaurants that used to be in Toronto.  That's the real ghost story of the CNE.  We took a break and then did more shopping.  Dvds.  Mostly horror.  Is anyone surprised?  I picked up EVENING and MRS HENDERSON PRESENTS and a salute to Jack Paar.  More shopping.  Couldn't get in to see Elvis Stoijko.  We left the building. 

     On to the midway.  Darlene threw darts at balloons and won a pink dolphin which she gave to George.  George gambled at the Crown and Anchor and got back the money he had "invested" before leaving.  Then there was some kind of birthday spin....George put two bucks on April and two on November and ended up with a yellow fuzzy teddy bear about eighteen inches tall!!! His name is Fuzzy!!!   It was a very full day...Now you know everything...

7:28AM - the garden Hotel...

    Just as labour day arrives, I'm reaching a point where I wish the garden had been all year.  Under control?!  It's taken a while.  My batting average has been about once every fourteen days.  Sometimes it rained, sometimes I was sick, or sometimes I couldn't get there, but I managed once every two weeks but unfortunately started late.  I'm blaming the bank since a bank disaster left me with no spare time.  Still, spending a day every two weeks on my hands and knees blissfully pulling out weeds and making it look nice gives me a nice feeling of tranquility.  This week I found a fair sized toad in the garden.  I'm always worried about what I'll find, now that I know there's a ground hog nearby.  Think I know where his hole is--he's living under the bike shed in the back.  We're making progress.  Last year, I didn't find the bike shed until later--that's how overgrown it was.  There is still lots of work to do, but the front lawn and garden is pretty respectable, and it's my aim for the back to look the same way.  The lady of the house just wants to pave the back yard, but I keep telling her the sun on the pavement will cause reflecting heat.  As it stands, there's a beautiful side garden next to the garage which I've half filled with portulaca, but would probably make a terrific garden space for tomatoes.  But tomatoes/vegetable gardens and groundhogs are not a good combo.  Anyway, I'll try to keep working to see how far I get, and will probably throw in the trowel after Thanksgiving!!  

Other than that, I'm watching retro tv.  What else is new?  Latest entry is HOTEL.  Like the Arthur Hailey novel, based on the comings and goings of people in a large luxury hotel. Apparently it played in the early 80's before I had a VCR, and I was kind of busy at the time, going to theatre, performing theatre and godknowswhatelse, but I don't remember being home much during this time period...It stars James Brolin who I mostly remember from occasional 70's tv movies, and MARCUS WELBY....but now more infamous as the man who has lately married Barbra Streisand. He has this terrific bedside manner  and he solves lots of problems in the HOTEL series, so I can only fantasize what he must be like as a husband...except Barbra got there first... 

    The series started off with Bette Davis who left after filming the pilot.  She was the owner of the Hotel but ended up with Anne Baxter replacing her as her sister in law....for a while, they left it open that she might have returned, but it never happened...Funny thing is, I only know Anne Baxter from that other Bette Davis movie, ALL ABOUT EVE.  I checked the database, and really haven't seen too many of her movies beyond the one she did with Angela Lansbury (Season of Passion) and the Columbo she did, but I can probably re-catch her Batman tv appearances on You Tube.  So I'm watching all her line readings as if she's still scheming from ALL ABOUT EVE, it's kind of ground into my head.  Meanwhile all kinds of interesting people check into the hotel, and this is NOT LOVE BOAT...They deal with issues that would have been tossed overboard, like potential child molesting for example in one episode.  I was thrilled to see Ron Ely (from the episode TARZAN--haven't seen him since uh Tarzan....Still very nice looking and very charming.  Mostly it seems to be a revolving door of guest stars from DALLAS but I'm thrilled to see Hermione Gingold or Hope Lange or whoever comes in next....Liz Taylor is in the opening episode of Season Two, so I hope that makes it to dvd.  In the meantime, I'm glued to the tube !  

10:25AM - MONOPOLYizing the situation....

     Normally we try to stay close to home.  No, that's a lie.  With Halifax, Copenhagen, the Caribbean, Orlando and Cyprus under his belt, George seldom stays home.  I try to stay home.  And catch up on tv from previous decades.  Always paranoid I've missed something.  Twenty years from now, I'll be catching up on CSI, LOST, and HOUSE.  So the news is we went to play Monopoly with Lianne and David in Mississauga.  It means crossing a line that says "Welcome to Mississauga" and another transit system to contend with.  I googled before I went so I'd have a better Idea of where we were going.  (Yes, we were there two years ago, but I'd forgotten the directions...) 

     The theme was Chocolate-Opoly.  We came prepared with chocolate Hershey kisses, Peppermint Patties and other ilk, and Lianne had some chocolate covered bits and bites.  No one starved.  It was a very interesting game.  Properties were all named after various chocolate edibles, but as we went around the board, no one was able to gain a complete set of properties.  We have also learned never to wheedle and deal with George, as there's only one person who''s going to gain from the transaction.  Eventually Lianne gained control of the fourth "railroad" which meant anyone landing on a "railroad" had to pay her $200.00 while everyone else was nickeling and diming their way around the board with the highest rent being $50.00.  It was a spirited game.  Lots of vented frustration.  I kept donating my $200 for passing INDULGE to the centre of the board, and Lianne kept collecting it when she landed on FREE SAMPLES.  I could claim she rigged the game, but that's just poor sportsmanship.  So instead I'll concede our hostess with the mostess won fair and square when we closed the proceedings at 6pm.   Then we had a nice roast--George was raving about her roasted potatoes, but everything else was delectable, and started watching Retro-Tv.  That would be Muppets and Brady Bunch!   Santi and Anna dropped over, and I miss my university days when you'd huddle around the tv and watch it together and shout out cat calls.  (Well, that was the way we'd watch THE GONG SHOW, which might have been more deserving of that attention...) 

    Afterwards, Dave and Lianne drove us home.  Still not sure what the slow up was on the 401, but we were listening to retro music, (okay ABBA amongst others) and didn't want the  night to end...  Thank you for a wonderful evening!   Re-match will be forthcoming!!!!!

8:11PM - back from the swamp waters with Iolanthe after midnight...

    Suddenly it's Friday again.  How did that happen?  Where did the week go?  I can tell you in one word;   DEXTER.  Season 3 arrived on disc and I couldn't wait to start it!  I had to finish Dr. Dick first (Season 3, Diagnosis Murder), which I was really enjoying as well.  However, Tuesday morning, I watched an episode of DEXTER before work and I was excited all over again.  Season 2 was all about cleaning up after yourself.  Season 3 was about Family.  When I came home that night, I watched two more episodes before George came home.  Wednesday it was over cast and had been raining and looked like it was going to rain.  I started watching more DEXTER, and then called in against gardening.   when the sun brightened up, I felt guilty.  It's been a strange summer.  Last year I was over there almost every week, but this year, I started late and only managed an appearance once every two weeks.  Them's the breaks.  Sometimes I was sick or it was rainy--it wasn't deliberate.  So enough of my guilt--I sat and watched seven episodes of DEXTER in one day.  I contemplated sharing my feelings on line or on Facebook, but I was terrified that someone would write back " Have you gotten to the part where Dexter's inside the CocaCola machine and he's thrown overboard?"  I hate spoilers.  Without spoiling it, I loaned it to Mark to enjoy.  He'll be happy to know that Dexter goes golfing, and goes shopping in Walmart and is just like anyone else you might know....except he's hiding a big dark secret about his part time hobby.  Killing off those who had it coming.  

     What else?  An episode or two of Charlie's Angels and Love Boat.  We seem to be going through an Aaron Spelling spell.  It has a downside.  Sometimes that theme music stays in my brain the morning after.  Speaking of The Morning After, I am coming to the end of MILLION DOLLAR MERMAID and I was thrilled to find that Esther Williams had been asked to star in THE POSEIDON ADVENTURE.  Well, we all know she can hold her breath under water for as long as it takes to cross the pool.  Hell, she can even sing underwater!  She could have turned The Poseidon Adventure into a real musical!!!  When I went to the internet data base, I found out Petula Clark had been asked to play Nonnie, the singer.  'How are things above the kitchen?"  Well, Esther Williams turned down both The Poseidon Adventure, and we never had the thrill of seeing Esther fall out of a glass elevator in THE TOWERING INFERNO either.  I'm guessing she read the scripts and said she wanted to live happily ever after, and Irwin Allen doesn't guarantee that.  

     George has just asked me if I'm writing my memoirs, and in a way, that's what these blog entries are.  They'll help remind me how I spent too many a dark and stormy night that we've had around here, and we're about to have another!  Last night, after a particularly unmemorable episode of LOVE BOAT, I turned off the computer, finished the dishes, and decided what I'd watch before I turned out the light.  NOrmally I pick a sit com, and about fifteen minutes usually does it.  I decided something different.  I opted for IOLANTHE.  The Stratford version that was taped for CBC.  First I checked out the Special Features, updates to the script, and  a little documentary about Stratford hosted by Harvey Kirck.  Then I began to wonder what happened to Harvey Kirck.   
He's dead.  Been dead for a while.   

    I started watching the video, which starred Maureen Forrester as a kindred spirit, the Queen of the Fairies.   Eric Donkin was her co-star, and yes, he's gone to his grave as well.  As for some of the other performers, most have seem to have vanished into obscurity, like Karen Wood, Marie Baron  and Paul Massel.  Anyway, I"m watching this video and its bringing back memories of when I took a trip to Stratford to see it the first time around.  The poster was on my bedroom wall as a reminder for at least fifteen years afterwards.  They changed some of the lyrics which appalled the Toronto Gilbert and Sullivan Society residents at the time, but the Stratford festival managed to jump on the renewed popularity of G&S which was probably a good thing and they produced four or five of them over a number of years, and at one point, they had three going in repertoire.  At one point, I was in a local production.  Why am i telling you this?  Watching this video at 10:30 at night suddenly grasped my attention and by midnight, I'm singing along at the top of my voice the act one finale!  I got myself wired up in memories and remembering lyrics I haven't sung in fifteen years that I still couldn't get much sleep until about two in the morning.  
I still haven't watched act two, but I think I remember how it ends.  A happy ending.  Unlike the Poseidon.  Or reality sometimes...
    Then there's what went down today in the office, but I'll save that for another time.  Another suitcase in another hall....

6:05PM - boogie nights--evocative soundtrack--downer of a movie...

    Blogging is the original Reality Show.  I blog.  You watch.  You can believe what  you want or read between the lines.  

     About four months ago, we started watching George's Christmas present.  Planet Of The Apes.  There's five in the series and then there's the tv series.  We still have one more to go of the original movies, but in spite of a little action figure of Zira watching us from the top of the computer, we haven't gone yet to CONQUEST FOR THE BATTLE OF THE PLANET OF THE ATTACKING MONKEY CLONES.  Maybe that's a good thing, but last week, we started OLIVER TWIST.  It's  a three part adaptation, including the prequel that Charles Dickens never wrote, but someone thought we need to make this version different.  It has Julie Walters in it amongst others.  I was hoping we'd go there this weekend, but George just wasn't "feeling cerebral".  I want to dial that one in.  "Sorry, I can't make it to the office today.   I'm just not feeling Cerebral!".  I know.  Take the pink tablets. 

     Instead we opted for a Sunday afternoon film.  Instead of Masterpiece Theatre, we opted for Masterbate Theatre with a PJ Anderson opus called BOOGIE NIGHTS.  I know I'd seen it when it came out, but that was twelve years ago.  I knew what it was about, the porn industry, but I think I prefer ORGAZMO which handled the material in such a way that you could still walk out of the theatre with a warm smile.  PJ Anderson makes downer films.  I have since hated his MAGNOLIA (it's raining cats and frogs out there...) and another messterpiece called PUNCH DRUNK LOVE with Adam Sandler.  Ask me why?  I dunno.  Really.  Enough time must have elapsed that I'd forgotten my feelings for the previous films.  BOOGIE NIGHTS offers Burt Reynolds as a director of porn films.  While we never see what I fingered through a Cosmo to see in the 70's, he does have a nice wig and gives a winning performance.  It also offers the lovely Julianne Moore as an industry veteran who experiences the highs and lows.  Heather Graham plays Rollergirl--if she had an actual name, I don't think I ever heard it mentionned, and I don't think she ever takes off those roller skates, something I'd wanna do in a water bed.  Marky Mark really stars as  Dirk Diggler, a male porn star that inspired George's new nick name, Woolly Wiggler, but let's not go there.  What I did appreciate about the movie is that deep down, it was a musical.  All of the songs were commenting brilliantly on the action.  For example, as Rollergirl was flailing about on the bed and about to be laid, we heard the strains of Melanie singing "I've got a pair of brand new rollerskates!  You've got a brand new key!"  She also had a loverly bunch of coconuts, which you'd need, too if you want to survive in the porn industry.  The film takes us through a period of about six years....enough time to be discovered, become a star and ultimately become all washed up.  The whole experience left me hungering for a Deanna Durbin movie which I plan to get revenge and force George to watch...I'm thinking  CAN"T HELP SINGING should be perfect...

     Later....    
    

10:21AM - okay, I'm not trying 540 recipes in 365 days but....

......I did buy this box set of James Bond movies.  On a one day special from Amazon. Worked out to about $5.00 a movie at the time....  I think there's like 21 movies in there, and we're working our way through them chronologically. Can we do this within a year without going a little Spy Versus Spy Crazy?  

      Last night was FROM RUSSIA WITH LOVE.  Sean Connery.  For some, he's the ONLY real James Bond.  I always kind of liked him, but I was more excited with a relatively rare film appearance with Lotte Lenya.  Widow of Kurt Weill.  They didn't ask him to write the theme song.  He had already passed on, so they chose Lionel Bart who had previously given the world OLIVER!   I think that was the only James Bond theme song he was asked to write, and after hearing it twice, I couldn't sing a line from it to save my spying soul.  It also stars Robert Shaw who played the cantankerous Quint in JAWS, only here he's much more of a hunk with L'Oreal Blondissima hair cut very short, and he doesn't talk much.  Mostly he stalks and kills.  What do I like about this heterosexual fantasy of James Bond?  Well, exotic locales--this one doesn't spend nearly enough time in Venice.  There's an attache case with hidden guns, knives and poisonous gas, so yeah, the gadgetry.  Everything flows smoothly-- sophisticated dialogue with a sexual undertone lying there, so you know this is of British derivation.  Less is always more!  It ain't the sex scenes, although the bathing suits were probably quite provocative for its time. 

     As for trying to be Julie and  Julia in the kitchen, I made FIVE CUP SALAD.  Or as George likes to call it, GORDIE MARSHMALLOW SALAD.  The first time I had it was Paul Jennison's mother made it on a day trip to Peterborough and I begged her for the recipe.  Decades ago.  You can make it, too.  One cup of coloured mini-marshmallows, one cup of sour cream, one cup of mandarin orange pieces, one cup of pineapple bits, and one cup of cocanut.  George kept trying to get me to put in walnuts, but I said NUTS to that.  Throw everything together in  a bowl, mix it together and then leave it for two days if you can.  As Lucy Ricardo would say,  ".....and TASTY, Too!!!:" 

5:26PM - i'm back and it didn't take three months...

     Okay, so there's some egg on my face.  Made this vow to write more frequently on this blog.  Then we had this storm from hell on Thursday.  It looked bad.  Sky getting real dark, seeing glimmers of lightning in the distance and ominous thunder.  I'm deciding do I really need to buy another three bags of milk when I have part of one still left in the fridge?  Wasn't sure if there was enough for breakfast, so rather than come in to the office with no breakfast and be crabby for the first half of the day, I made the trip to NO FRILLS and bought the milk.  The approaching storm looked even worse when I came out.  Luckily George was home when  I got home.  I was worried...He has a metal cane, and ever since Ben Franklin was flying a kite in a thunderstorm with a metal key on the end of it, things haven't been the same.  Some child was killed last week by a bolt of lightning for carrying a metal scooter.  George is too much a happy go lucky guy to worry about thunder bolts and lightning (very very frightening to me, Galileo!) 

    For the record, I never really figured out what Bohemian Rhapsody was really all about.  Bought a ticket to see WE WILL ROCK YOU and it still didn't make any more sense, even if you can see THRILLER on stage in London.  Where was I?  Oh yes, a thunder storm.  By the time I got home, I started making one of my chicken/onion, CAMPBELLS MUSHROOM SOUP, and a few vegetables in a No-Stick frying pan.  George was having one of those pizzas I picked up for $3.79 when they were on sale at NO FRILLS.  It got scary out.  George was blithely listening to JAWS as each thunder clap made me pray a little louder to Sondheim.  I decided I'd better turn off my computer, and it froze, so I pushed the Turn On button real long and it turned off.  The problem was that later on, after tornados had made 41 houses uninhabitable in Vaughan, my computer wouldn't come back to normal.  It kept coming back to a blank screen with a line about INTEL Line 1,w hatever that meant.  George had booked his computer guru for Saturday morning to put his computer back into shape, so I asked him to come a little early and try to fix mine.  Well, you're reading this now, so you know it's fixed.  And we still have a roof over our heads but I can't get over how devastating the storms are nowadays.  I freak, run for cover.  I've mentally established if a tornado warning is issued again, we're heading for the parking garage and the stairwell...

    Went to the opera today.  One of those specials THE MET AT THE CINEPLEX or however they're called.  Repeat broadcast from last year.  Still works for me.  Do people complain about Mona Lisa and say they don't want to see that one again?  This was called LA FILLE DU REGIMENT.  Donizetti.  The same Italian who gave us all that Scottish tragedy in LUCIA DI LAMMERMOOR has gone closer to his roots with a tale about a young orphan woman who was adopted by a French army in love with a young man from the other side of the Tyrolian mountains.  Presumed Austrian, but when you're in love, you're not always looking too carefully at passports.  It starred Natalie Dessay, who I loved in LA SOMNOMBULA.  She's very energetic, and this one was definitely re-written as a comedy, although a couple of her arias shouldn't be sung so serious.  Natalie is the orphan Maria (yes, this was written long before someone tried to solve the problem of Maria in the mountains) who is seen washing clothes, ironing, peeling potatoes, and singing bel canto while upside down. She also has this kooky pigtail that makes me want to laugh, she's wearing what looks like an undershirt (is her chest strapped?) and she's an Unsinkable tom boy....that cooks, cleans and has become beloved by her regiment.   Natalie  should write a HOW TO SUCCEED AS A SOPRANO WITHOUT REALLY TRYING because I'm sure no one prepared her for a role like this.  At one point she's still belting out beautiful high notes while being carried off six feet high above the chorus.  Her lover is Juan Diego Florez in a role that established Luciano Pavarotti as the King Of the High C's decades ago.  Juan does not disappoint. 

One of his arias was one that was being prepared for that other Met film, THE AUDITION which I saw and appreciated last June.  There are a few great rousing tunes in this opera, and Marian Seldes brushes up her French and manages to get away with a Non-Singing role.  I can't remember laughing so much and having such a great time.  

7:30PM - BUS STOP, and I'm not talking Marilyn Monroe...

     I actually felt sad when they tore down the bus shelter on the corner.  It was probably new in the 70's, and they've replaced the bus shelters on the other three corners so they took their sweet time.  It did look on the grungy side--and really only fit three or four people comfortably because everyone has to have their own 'personal" space, but if it was raining, or snowing, we'd managed about eight or nine suddenly friendly people.  So they tore it down.  They also removed the extra bench a few months ago, which was an extra luxury, next to the mail box.  The latest insult was the removal of the garbage cans. 

     In my secret identity, I was also the protector of the shelter.  There's a business in the street corner where the culprit used to advertise flyers and plaster them over the walls of the shelter.  At one point, the sign in the shelter about unlawful postings was removed.  Mostly it was the jeweler and the traffic ticket/immigration person who plastered the most notices.  I'd delight in tearing them down so you could uh see the bus coming.  So we've lived for about two weeks without a shelter.  Then I notiiced they tore up the concrete and laid fresh concrete a few days later.  It's coming!  it's coming!

   This morning, there was a new shelter.  It has the name of the street on it in smart lettering.  It's also much taller than the previous version, or for that matter, any other shelter I've seen.  It's like fifteen feet tall and slanted and open glass.  At the edge of a parking lot.  I hope the cars see it.  I also removed two freshly put up posters from the jeweler, begging for people to sell their old gold.  I'm proud we have a brand new state of the art (oh yeah--it comes with it's own advertising--a full wall but I forget what it's displaying!)  And speaking of advertising, COORS BEER (from Yonge Eglinton) has dropped it's advertising campaign in BC saying the beer is "colder than the people of Toronto".  Which is just as well.  You are what you are, and it's not based on borders....

7:30AM - a barbecue in the country....but still technically in Toronto...

     One of my favorite things to do is go grocery shopping at No Frills at 8:00 on a Saturday morning.  You don't have the place to yourself, but this is as good as it gets.  Probably no line up at the cashier, everything has been put on the shelves (if they have it) and the least number of people around you as you shop.  I took my little trolley thing because DIET COKE was on sale.  Yes, it was also on sale at Metro (formerly Dominion).  Metro had it featured on the front page of their flyer, 4.99 for a case of 12.   No Frills had it on the front page of their flyer 4.99 for a case of 24.  Duh.  So  i picked up five cases at NoFrills and pushed the trolley  home, along with a few other specials like Listerine.  I felt like I was being unfaithful to Shoppers Drug Mart--normally I wait until Shoppers have one of their 20 times the points days, and then buy six bottles of Listerine, six bottles of Scope and everything else I can think of to hit the minimum $75.00 limit to rack up the points.  It does pay off eventually and you get a free shopping trip!  I've also become a SCENE member (what took me so long?) so if I go to the movies ten times, the next ones for free.  I don't go to lots of movies--maybe one a month or so, but it adds up.  Wish I'd had it when I started buying my opera movies.   Somewhere I hear a little voice saying, 'Saves money, too, Madge!"   That's from a Palmolive ad.  I don't use Palmolive.  I usually buy whatever dish soap is cheap and has a nice smell, since I want that nice smell for the first minute as I'm pouring the hot water....

     We went to a barbecue yesterday afternoon.  It was probably early evening.  We were invited to last year's but we didn' t go.  I'm semi-terrified of parties where you don't know anyone, but the host, Gary is a real sweetheart and Marlon was going and we haven't seen him in years.  The party was way out east in Toronto.  The city limits.  I left home at 10 to 2, and we arrived around 4:30.  Okay, so I stopped and bought beer--Gary said just bring a smile but I can't do that--so I brought a six pack of Labatt's Blue which is what I used to drink like 25 years ago and I'm kind of glad they still make it--I didn't see Brador or Molson Export on the menu and a six pack of Stella Artois because of the money they spend on the ad campaigns.  If you drink their beer, it means you lead a sexy life as James Bond or something...

So we get on the Lawrence bus 54 - A and it takes its sweet time going across the city.  (Gary did suggest the GO TRAIN, but I thought to go downtown and wait for the hourly train to save time???)  I'm kind of urged to go down memory lane on the Lawrence bus.  For the first part of the journey, I read George the paper--the Direct Access column and Dear Ellie.  Then we're up to Wilket Creek Park, and there's no sign of INN ON THE PARK--I think it burned down or got torn down--I remember going to some ad campaign there about ten years ago with Naomi and Martin.  I'm remembering the times we spent in Wilket Creek and Sunnybrook park as a kid.  I also remembered it adjoined the summer day camp for blind kids where I spent a summer and whether or not I was ever George's counsellor is still argued today...There's what was my sister's apartment on Lawrence--there's different balconies on it now, so the paintings on the balcony my other sister painted are now gone with the wind.  There's a new front on the Don Mills Library where I used to go on Saturdays with my dad and grandmother.  The Don Mills plaza has been taken down and there's a new assortment of buildings there now, but you can't go home again Dorothy...Borden's doesn't seem to be there anymore but I still see Sealtest dairy trucks when we hit Railside Drive.  There's a NO FRILLS but no sign of the Cineplex where Catherine was robbed at the instabank after seeing a movie.  If you're reading this, only use bank machines in broad dayliight where there are lots of people around.  

     Dairy Queen has now turned into Steak Queen.  Holima Chinese Foods is still there, where we used to get our Chinese food on special occasions like New Years.  The KFC is still there where we used to get the 2 for 1 snack packs occasionally.  I'm awash in memories and George is rolling his eyes and acting like I've completely lost it.  What else is new?  The little plaza at Lawrence and Pharmacy is now like an international market and the further we get into Scarborough, it's a new domain.  There's the nursing home where my mom worked and she always seemed to know who was going to die next.  There's what was a MR. DONUT only it's now a car dealership.  No sign of what was the Copper Kettle restaurant. I used to have a Scarborough accent, but I lost it.  If I got one now, I'd have to speak Indian or Chinese... There's where I bought my first electric typewriter.  We had one at home that you had to pound the letters on the keyboard.  There's a scene in JULIE AND JULIA where she puts in two sheets of carbon into the typewriter to make a copy or two which brought back memories.  Now as I type,people can read from all over and I don't have to use carbon.  I see the McGregor Park Library which is the place I remember being taken to and I took out the Freddy the Pig books.  Betsy books.  Three Boys On A Bike or whatever that series was.  When I was a young kid, I used to read a lot.  Nowadays, I probably read about three or four books a year.  Currently reading MILLION DOLLAR MERMAID, an autobiography by Esther Williams.  She's talking about being chased by Johnny Weissmuller (TARZAN) with a constant erection.  Who knew?  She said No.  I would have said Yes, but Tarzan's not chasing me...

     There's what was the A&P, and a restaurant also called The Wexford where Breakfast Television sometimes visits.  There's a place where I used to have one of my first jobs, a warehouse.  I think I thought I was Tom in THE GLASS MENAGERIE where I used to retreat to back areas and write poetry.  The job lasted about three months or so, replacement for someone on a training leave.  I used to pack printed stuff for banks and have it shipped to their various branches across Canada.  All I can remember is that it was called IAC, and the Niagara Finance Company was part of it.  I should Google it and find out what happened to it?  Ironically, the company I work for was owned by another company called IAC.  As I explain all of this, George just rolls his eyes again and again and humours me.  I start to break into "Memories may beautiful and yet too painful to remember...." but I'm not   Barbra.  Eventually we hit Cedarbrae Mall, which has had a makeover as well, since Simpsons went Kaput, and I'm trying to remember what stores were there thirty years ago.  I see a NO FRILLS, a TOYS R US and  a Canadian Tire....  We also pass the plaza where I bought my first show music album.....(DrumRoll please)  Jesus Christ Superstar--a studio cast album I decided I wanted after listening to it in Sunday School.  There's another shocker....I also used to go to Sunday School.  Regularly.  Not like I go to the gym (once every twenty years).  I don't remember too much about it.  I remember getting some kind of prize for memorizing all the books of the old and new testaments, and at one point being asked to read something to the congregation.  God,I could have ended up religious and knocking on people's doors like those boys in ORGAZMO.  We travel further and further into Eastern Scarborough, past Markham Road, Morningside, Meadowvale....all these M words until they start saying BEECHGROVE and MARINA VIEW  and I know I'm  somewhere over the rainbow...or at least in totally new territory where I've never been.  

      There's some kind of road block.  About eight or ten police cars.  We detour and I start to panic.  I don't want to know.  The road eventually turns into a two laner and we come to the End Of The Line.  We walk and follow Lawrence as it turns into Rouge Hills Drive.  We're beside the Rouge River.  I keep telling George if he brought  a canoe, we could paddle upstream and we'd end up at the Toronto Zoo and he could talk to his fellow Woollies.  I get a dirty look.  There are some beautiful houses, some Monster houses and mostly I'm checking out the gardens.  I'm also counting the house numbers.  I googled the address and know we're in for a bit of a hike.  But the sun is out, it's glorious blue sky weather and as of August the fifteenth, Summer Is Finally Here!!!  We get to Gary's house, with   a long driveway.  I feel like I'm Dame Edna on her Neighbourhood Watch.  There's a big window box of geraniums on the side of the house, a few cars in front and no sign of people so we make our way into the back yard and discover about twenty people on the back deck.  Gary said four pm.  It's now four thirty.  Well, we weren't the last to arrive and I don't think it's a big deal.  Though Gary's told me stories about the house before and seen pictures, I've never actually been here and it's nice seeing it all.  

    Most of the guests are members of the Toronto Prime Timers.   Fred  is there.  I never know when I'm going to bump into Fred--we've been casual acquaintances for about 25 years--he was best friends with one of my best friends who passed away in 1990.  I last saw Fred representing PRIMETIMERS  at the travel show last May at Maple Leaf Gardens.  Join the Primetimers!   Of course, you have to admit to being over forty, as that's what the membership starts at.  George would have to admit this, too.  I somehow don't think it's going to happen for a while because Reality hasn't quite Bitten.  I looked them up on the internet, which also had their business meetings posted.  Glad to see they're already planning the Christmas party.  Gary welcomes us and makes a few introductions and offers us drinks.  George goes for a Molson Canadian, which is a nice gesture seeing as how he's from Cyprus.  What I like most about Gary is his sense of humour,akin to Alfred Hitchcock's.  He likes to tell stories with a sense of sardonic humour and you wonder if your leg is being pulled.  Very dry, very funny.  Mostly, he tells it like it is. Gary gives me the grand tour of his home, upstairs and down.  Some of it I've seen before in pictures.  The deck was rebuilt after a tree came crashing down on it and broke a window.  The guys who rebuilt it were amongst the party guests.  If I'd been more like Jessica Fletcher and interviewed the party guests, it might have been more of a discovery of  This Is Your Life, Gary party, but I suspect most of the guests were PrimeTimers.  The life of the party might have been Lorraine, the only woman amongst 27 guests--an enviable position for most women, but she admitted she was a princess amongst queens!  However, everyone's antics were upstaged by a Schnauzer named Gus who ate carrots and celery and enjoyed racing down the considerable length of the back yard.  

     Should I talk about the spread of the food laid before us?  It was a barbecue, but there were trays of shrimp and crab meat, cold cuts, cheeses, vegetable trays with dip.  The thought of inviting 30 people over terrifies me.  Most I've had in my living room was six or seven, and sometimes they weren't' there for the food, but that's Another Story and Another Blog..As Chita Rivera sings in THE RINK, "Some day, I'm gonna tell you about the nights!"   Moving on, .Gary had a pal named Ed (?)  who volunteered to do ALL the cooking and wore a Hershey's apron.  Now you know who your friends ARE who would volunteer for a task like that!!!  Would you like steak or salmon?  I felt like I was at the Keg.  Only better!!  How would you like your steak?   George managed to get TWO steaks.  What the heck?  "He's Prettier!", answered Gary.  Bluntly.  George also sat beside a gentleman named Michael who's also gay, and also blind.  George was thrilled to meet another kindred spirit in his own city that he can relate to.  They chatted about the joys of airline travel and being treated like a princess.  Emails were exchanged.  To be continued.  

     My favorite part of any party is when everyone goes home and there's less people, and everyone is more relaxed.  Why shouldn't we be?  I left out  mentionning the nanaimo bars, grass hopper pie, chocolate eclairs!  Lots more.  And pineapple, melon, watermelon, cantelope, grapes, strawberries!!  I didn't leave any on my plate!II I also checked out the garden--amazing lawn without dandelions going back for quite a while, nice flowers and shrubs, very idyllic!  A little bench semi-hidden by some cedars for lovers to smooch.  Angela Lansbury used to sing "How'd you like to spoon with me?" but no one uses that expression anymore since "sucking face" became popular in On Golden Pond...  I didn't want to be the last one at the party--it was starting to resemble an episode of HARPER'S ISLAND...and bodies were disappearing into the night, so we bid our grateful thanks to  Gary and the rest...

     I caught up with Marlon who belonged to Rainbow Voices and is now part of GUYS LIKE US.  Small gay chorus.  Still can't find the website.  Found three performances on YOU TUBE and am thinking about joining.  Marlon rode his bike with us to the bus stop then headed off for the GO BUS.  Marlon is probably the most physically fit person I know and does the major ride from Toronto to Montreal for an Aids fundraiser for the last three years.  He's also very buoyant and outgoing!  Anyway, it was a great barbecue and we had a wonderful time!!  

    

9:00AM - julie and julia

My sister emailed me to ask me if my blog was dead.  I think that was about two weeks ago.  I didn't answer her.  That would be like admitting it, and I'm not sure I want to give it up completely.  There are a couple of factors.  One.  Blame Work.  Banking disaster that took way too much time and stress to pick up the mess after left me not wanting to look much at a computer in my spare time.  Number two:  Facebook.  Some call it Crackbook because it takes up a lot of your time.  I just find it easier to write two sentences in an update on a daily basis or so like "is trying to find the meaning of life at No Frills at 8am on a Saturday morning" than two or three paragraphs on a blog.  Then there's the privacy issue and how much info I want to put out there.  Anyway, after watching JULIE AND JULIA I hope to give blogging another faithful try. 

     I went by myself.  Last minute decision.  George didn't want to go, and the movie WAS on DVS for at least the first week.  Opportunity is NOT a lengthy visitor, so I decided to go without George.  He wasn't upset.  I also want to see Harry Potter in 3-D IMAX, but it means waiting around downtown after work which I'm not too big on...Other than that, there's not a lot of movies I "NEED" to see.  I sat through those cute ads for MILK.  It doesn't make me drink any more or less milk than I drink.  Then came the coming attractions.  One was for THE STEPFATHER.  Horror story.  Uncharted territory, since Stepmothers have had a bad rap since Cinderella.  I'm going to have to wait a while before I see this one (I know George will drag me...) since the trailer tells the essential story.  John Cusack's also in a disaster movie called 2012 (which essentially shows us the end of the world.  It opens Friday the Thirteenth of November.  Happy Birthday To Me! 

   I was beginning to forget what  movie I was going to see when JULIE AND JULIA began.  Lots of names.  Most importantly, MERYL STREEP.  She's an actress I thought WOW at an early age--and I think it was KRAMER VERSUS KRAMER, because her two minutes in MANHATTAN didn't really count.  I also loved her in THE FRENCH LIEUTENANT'S WOMAN which I kept remembering during this movie.  It's basically two stories that echo and comment on each other.  Julie is a modern day blogger who's working the phone lines after 9/11 and looking for meaning in her life.  She decides she's going to try every recipe in Julia Child's cookbook MASTERING THE ART OF FRENCH COOKING, and there's like over 500 recipes in there.  And then blog about the experiences.  It's a big effort to try to pull off, and the movie also tells the story of Julia Child (la Streep) and her husband played by Stanley Tucci (who played her co-worker/boss? in THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA) and how she's learning French cooking in France.  This is a familiar tale, if you watched Audrey Hepburn break eggs in SABRINA.  In this case, Ms. Child chops onions bringing tears to her own eyes, but all I can smell is buttery Popcorn.  Yes, I armed myself with popcorn.  You can't see a movie about food without having some readily available...

 Ms Child's voice is what?  Peculiar, but as I've never watched her cooking show (time to check out YOUTUBE--there's probably dozens--it's probably authentic enough.  Ms. Streep has said she's tried to emulate her mother's joie de vivre in her performance, but the accent sounds like Joan Plowright a little fried on Chianti.  It always sounds slightly surprised and kind of out of it, so I had problems accepting it dramatically, but it's another feather in the oeuvre of the Divine Meryl's.  The story of Julia Child seems to be a little idealized. 

   The story of Julie the blogger I could relate to much more.  She says she's never actually eaten an egg.  Well, she's eaten them in cakes but not an actual egg by itself.  Me neither.  I think I've had an omelet once or twice to be polite, but I run from Scrambled Eggs and Ham.  Lots of things I live in fear I'll be asked to eat.  The thought of eating all those recipes one after the other just freaks me out, so this was my horror movie, George!  Anyone who has eaten here has probably had one of my repertoire of maybe 20 different meals.  Same, same, same.  I don't know when it started but I started eliminating foods I felt comfortable eating at an early age.  Anyway, this isn't about me.  It's about the movie, and it jumps back and forth between the time periods.  One thing I love about Europe is they don't tear everything down--you can make a period picture there more easily because you just modify the costumes and cut out modern day advertising and cars--the buildings haven't changed so much in forty years.  

    Eventually Frances Sternhagen turns up in a small role and she's starting to look more like Miss Daisy, the role she originated a few decades ago.  When the movie was over, I went to Wikipedia to find out what happened ever after.  The movie gives you a few clues, but it left you wanting more...which is the sign of a good cook and a good filmmaker....

7:31PM - i've written another complaint letter....

Dear Cineplex Management

    I attended I PURITANI today at the Grande Cineplex at 12 pm.  It’s an opera about a woman who gets stranded at the altar and goes a little mad and then ultimately there’s a happy ending. After my 12 pm date at the opera, I went a little mad, and I am depending on your attention to what went wrong to ensure there will be a happy ending next time. There is a lot of attention to details that needs focus. 

The opera at the cinema experiment has proven very successful with the number of crowds that attend at the Grande. While I’ve been attending live opera since 1980, I only recently began attending the performances at the movies since January of this year. I am now kicking myself for not attending because they are such a fabulous overwhelming experience, being up close to the performers. It’s a new high for Toronto. I was aware that they Met was repeating some broadcasts in the States and was looking on the website for the last two weeks to see if there would be a Canadian tie-in. I only noticed I PURITANI by chance in the Friday listings, so you need to tell your marketing department about this. This might explain that it was the least attended film opera yet. There might have been fifty or sixty people in the auditorium. If you tell them, they will come. 

    I came early to buy a ticket thinking it might be sold out. The #1 theatre did NOT have air-conditioning. They were playing ads without sound for FOREVER PLAID, and I read my one sheet synopsis. At about seven minutes after the hour, it became apparent that there was some kind of sound problems to be worked out. About quarter after 12, it was announced that the film would not be shown in the theatre, and we were moved to theatre #3. 

As we entered, we noticed both sound and AIR CONDITIONING. The manager Dennis went around with apologies and distributing free passes for the next special event, and the opera started at 12:30. Okay, so it didn’t start on time. I can live with that. 

    The opera began, and after the credits came the opening chorus of soldiers. I didn’t know what they were singing about, but I thought maybe it wasn’t that important. When the principals began singing, there was no SUBTITLES. My knowledge of Italian can barely get me through the menu at Il Fornello’s. “Houston, We Have A Problem!” I ran out into the lobby and there was really no one about. I called to the beverage bar and shouted where’s the MANAGER several times. She said “Down the hall to the left!”   I went down the hall, and found an anteroom that seemed to lead to some elevators. There were two locked doors that said “Sprinklers’ and “Stars” or something but no sign of a manager’s office. I went back, calling out for a manager, an usher and there was NO ONE actively around. I went down the escalator to the ticket taker, followed by another gal who was upset by the performance on screen. The ticket taker understood the situation and began to make a phone call. As I made my way up the escalator, I saw the manager coming up. I explained what the situation was. That the opera is normally shown with SUBTITLES, and that this is pretty essential to the understanding of what is going on in the opera. As this was previously broadcast, it’s probably on a dvd projector, and all they have to do is find the right buttons and push them. The manager said it wasn’t that simple a solution and it had to do with “the Feed” of the program.   The other person was complaining actively about the colour composition as well.

     I returned to the opera and waited for a lull in the music and announced to the group of bewildered patrons that management was “working” on the resolution of the SUBTITLES. It was then that I noticed that the colour was kind of off for something that was a live program. The colours seemed washed out and faded—everything seemed to have a pinkish glow. The light green dress of the heroine would seem whiteish or pink depending. I shrugged my shoulders, but was getting frustrated trying to remember what the story was from the brief synopsis I’d read. 

The SUBTITLES didn’t come in until the third scene of act one. Try solving a murder mystery if you’ve missed the first thirty minutes without sound. It’s kind of like that. It spoiled the performance for me. And it gets weirder. And sure enough, fixing the dvd was apparently easy. They shut the screen, went back to the Opening Titles, and you saw someone push the button for SUBTITLES, and then push the button for ENGLISH. Why was this so hard to fix when the problem was pointed out in the first scene of the opera? 

     When they turned on the SUBTITLES, I noticed something had changed with the speakers. The sound had stopped coming from the left side and was only coming from the wall half way down the right side of the auditorium. It made it seem like the people were singing “off stage” sometimes, even though they were right in front of you. Even though the speakers were working at the beginning, after the switch to the SUBTITLES, the performance of the sound had changed. Was it worth trying to seek out someone to fix this again? It drove me a little mad, but decided I didn’t want to miss any more of the opera, such as it was. I also noticed the patron in front of me leave to never come back about this point. She was under 40. In a crowd like this, you notice the young ones. 

    Normally when the Met at the Cineplex plays, they have intermissions. Even at the Re-broadcasts. In this case, because they were playing dvd, it was as if they just plugged it in and then left the building. When each act came to an end, there was a brief interview and then on to the next act. Let me tell you about your audience for this kind of event. It’s mostly the Geritol and Depends set, with most ages from fifties to eighties. If you’re watching a three hour opera, these people need Bathroom Breaks!! Heck, even when they played regular movies like THE SOUND OF MUSIC or FIDDLER ON THE ROOF, there was an intermission in the Movie Theatre!   So this is what happens. All these old people are moving around as carefully as they can in the dark, and I’m praying they don’t slip and fall on the stairs as they make their trips to the loo. Think of the law suits that could be avoided, simply by having someone in the projector room somewhat familiar with the product, hitting the PAUSE button after the interview section, and having a staff member announce there will be a fifteen minute break!  What instructions were given to the staff about how to run these events when the previous ones have gone off perfectly well without a hitch??

    The opera comes to an end, and the credits have stopped. Now we’re back sitting in the dark looking at the Home Page of the DVD. No one is turning on the lights. Old people are about to slip and fall as they exit if someone doesn’t do something because at this point they have to leave. I run out to the lobby and start screaming MANAGER again like the boy who keeps crying WOLF. This is not the way this performance should end. 

While they had previously arranged a wine and cheese reception that was announced before anyone was aware of the foul-ups to occur, I am upset at the lack of professionalism abandoned for this showing. If it happened at this showing, I am hoping that it went off successfully at other CINEPLEX venues, but based on how it was handled here, who knows? I expressed my concerns that I’ve mentioned today to the manager, Dennis afterwards, but I think this needs to be brought to corporate attention for you to ensure the future professionalism of your presentations. 

    I am an opera at the movies fan, and plan to attend future showings. I am hoping “Attention Will Be Paid” to what I have said and that you will frankly be on top of things for the next outing. 

8:19PM - George writes a guest column....

            Well here we are the last day of a long weekend. It has been very relaxing to say the least. I even extended my weekend by one day and took off Friday as well. 

            Friday was heavenly as I spent it at the spa. There is something about being pampered from head to foot that lifts the soul and clears the mind of any worries.      At 2 pm my rejuvenation journey began. I had a 90 minute massage with a masseur called Josh. He was warm, tall, and wonderful with his hands. I sank into absolute bliss as he rubbed, stroked and stretched my body.      For those 90 minutes on the table, I didn’t have a care in the world and there was nobody else but Josh and I. It was only the beginning of what proved to be the most relaxing session at a spa I have experienced so far.

            After the massage I went for high tea at the Park Hyatt on Avenue road. For $26.00 you get a pot of tea of your liking, five finger sandwiches of various types five small tea pastries and three scones with fresh cream.    It sounds a lot but the sandwiches and pastries can be devoured within two bites. I felt like royalty though nibbling away on my delectables and sipping my English breakfast tea; the sense of Josh’s manipulations still fresh on my body. I practically glowed.    I sipped tea and munched for a good hour while listening to the latest book by E. Lynn. Harris titled “Just too good to be true.”

            After high tea, it was time for part two of my spa journey.    I had booked what was called a European Milk and Honey wrap and it was simply wonderful.    It was a three part treatment and lasted for 90 minutes as well.

            Part 1, exfoliation. My treatment provider Roy began with rubbing French sea salt all over my body. I always have males attend to me at spas as I truly can’t bare females touching me unless I’m having my hands or feet done. It may be my sexual orientation but I really can’t stand having a female touch me at a spa. At any rate, with a male provider I can be very comfortable doff off all clothing and not worry about a thing. Let me point out this is a reputable spa at the Park Hyatt so there is nothing sleazy about it; it is simply that I connect with a male rather then a female.    Now back to the treatment.

8:44AM - HAPPY BIRTHDAY, GEORGE!! I don't love Lucy!

       Yes, I have been negligent about writing as frequently as I'd liked.  I blame work, of course.  Overworked, understaffed, and things not running as smoothly as one would like.  As a result, I've been watching Mindless Retro Television.   I've been starting the day with an episode of BEAUTY AND THE BEAST, and at the end of the day, we'd sit down and watch I LOVE LUCY followed by LOVE BOAT.  I think George is contemplating another cruise.  The Princess boats are actually smaller than the ones we've ridden on.  The tv series is politically incorrect.  The same four staff members seem to be having romantic liasisons with the passengers and no one blinks an eye.  I emailed a former staff member (who left us due to anger management issues) to work on a cruise line) to see if fraternizing with the passengers ever actually happens.  Never heard back.  He also left the cruiseline to work in another call center  environment in Nova Scotia for a bank.   I wonder how he'll cope in the "new" environment.  His girlfriend  (also formerly of our company) moved out to Nova Scotia to be with him, and she's found work in a shoestore.  I wish them well. 

     I went to the opera/movies yesterday.  Actually  the opera that was performed live on February 7th which was re-broadcast yesterday.   I love seeing opera on the big screen.  I'll sit down in front because I"m greedy and don't want to share an arm-rest with a stranger.  No one is alone.  I went with Eric and Afgehni.  I also went with Mary.  I sat in the theatre at Yonge and Sheppard.  Eric and Afgehni sat in the theatre at Yonge and Sheppard.  Mary sat somewhere in Edmonton!  But we were experiencing this Donizetti blood bath of madness together. 

    I have my own agenda about LUCIA DI LAMMERMOOR.  It was the opera I was listening to on the night an arsonist decided to torch the laundry room beneath my apartment.  I saw it at the COC in the 80's in the days when they spent more on the name stars than the sets.  I also saw the televised performance from the Met with Joan Sutherland when the ringlets in her hair resembled  the Cowardly Lion more than a grief-stricken newlywed.  I also sat through a community theatre version of Lucia di Lammermoor starring a current coworker.  Community theatre in gifted hands can be wonderful.  Community opera in the hands of well-meaning amateurs can be deadly, with or without a dagger.  That was the last time I saw Lucia. 

    As the curtain rises upon the heath, Enrico and his men are searching for an intruder outside the castle.  I am totally in love with the set.  While the opera takes place in Scotland, it's sung in Italian.  It's cold, damp and occasionally snowing.  It looks like it's late afternoon, and the men would rather be in a pub.  Enrico is convinced the intruder is there for non-noble purposes.  It's the story of two rival families, and as lucky would have it, Enrico's sister Lucy is in love with Edgar from the warring family.  It's West Side Story on the set of Brigadoon.  Our leading players are about ten years older and much chunkier than Tony and Maria. I'm also convinced that anyone who plays Lucia should have Red Hair.  This is Lucy on the Heath with Chestnut Brown Hair.  And a face with bone structure that doesn't really change expression much.  She seemed to be sleepwalking her way through the performance.  Beautiful voice, lovely high bel canto notes, but always the same blank expression.   It's also something of a ghost story.  When Lucy comes to meet her lover Edgar at the fountain, we see the spectre of a beautiful girl once murdered years ago.  You'd like to  think Lucy is already beginning to lose her marbles because opera aficianados know Lucy goes bananas in the third act.  But no, we can all see Miss Il Muto, the spectre of the murdered girl.  They sell four types of Yogen Fruz in the lobby. 

     Now much as I was enjoying the singing and the set, I loved the show at intermission.  Watching the set come apart in giant jigsaw puzzles to be stored in a truck and delivered to some warehouse before the next performance!  I was brought up in an era when watching bill boards change signs was something of a revelation!  I adore watching the transformation of  the stage!  Act two is where Lucia is conned into signing the wedding contract.  She's going to marry the wealthy Arthur and restore the family fortunes, thanks to her conniving brother.   She finds out too late that she's done the wrong thing, and then there's a brilliant sextet while posing for one of those quaint wedding family portraits you see on FAMILY FEUD.  Lucy's looking left while everyone else is looking to the right.  Hello!  The advantages of sitting away from the crowd is one can get caught up in the emotion and quietly sing along without disturbing anyone.  I feel like I've died and gone to heaven.  But this isn't about me.  At intermission, I try the Two-Bite brownies, and return to watch the stage add on a giant staircase for act three, courtesy of computers and an unseen hero cranking at a wire pulley. 

     I wish George liked horror opera.  For this opera, Lucia takes a stab at her new marriage and slices up Arthur regrettably off-stage.  We're given a stroke by stroke action report from the local priest to the astonished crowd of how things are in Glocca Morra, or what Lucia's really been up to.  As Robert likes to quote from PSYCHO, "We all go a little mad sometimes..."   Then Lucia enters in her wedding dress, splashed in blood.  She's singing of how she's still in love with Edgar, and for some reason, the wall has disappeared and we see the rising of a giant moon.  Lovely visual.  But why?  What did that mean to you, Eric?  Lucia slips into some lovely high notes in the uppermost echelon only few can reach as she echoes a mournful flute.  The she slips into a medically induced coma, only to expire a few minutes into the next scene before Edgar and Enrico fight to the finish.  In spite of not being overwhelmed by the leading lady's performance, I had a wonderful time and can't wait for the next opera at the movie's excursion!!!

      More drama.  I rushed off to meet Woolly, Barbie, Ken, Swannee, Labatts, SuperDave, Sindara, and Brian for dinner.  Labatts arrived fashionably late.  We ate at the Keg, and had a wonderful time.  It was Woolly's 25th birthday again!  When we arrived home, I inadvertently got off at the wrong floor, and walked into a neighbour's apartment.  They left their door open, and were sitting on the floor, and I couldn't figure out what had happened to my furniture or where I was.  I guess it was my turn to go a little mad...We beat a quick retreat homewards, and almost got off on the wrong floor again?!!

11:31AM - La Sonnambula--Live From The Met--in North York!

In the song “Useless USEFUL PHRASES’, Elaine Stritch’s character points out “I’d like two tickets for La Sonnambula!” as particularly Useless. This, from the actress who figured the phrase she was singing “Perhaps a piece of Mahler’s!” was about a piece of cake. I’ll drink to that!

I bought one ticket for LA SONNAMBULA and went to see it as“Live From The Met on High Definition” at my local cineplex. It took me a five minute bus ride and one subway stop. When I got there, the place was packed mostly with seniors. I’d be hard pressed to find ten people in the audience who were younger than I was. This has really taken off!  The Cineplex had devoted three screens to the showing. I sat near the front where I’d be guaranteed I wouldn’t have to share an arm rest, and I could enjoy my smuggled can of Diet Coke. If George was with me, I would have smuggled him in a Bellini. George likes Bellini’s. They’re made with champagne, schnapps, a shot of vodka, and maybe some kind of fruit juice and crushed ice. Which is about as far as George goes for Bellini.

LA SONNAMBULA is an opera by Vincenzo Bellini. I don’t recall it ever being produced by the Canadian Opera Company in my opera-going lifetime. I’m not dead yet, and perhaps they’ll get around to it. If Joan Sutherland had stayed in town longer, she might have coerced Lofti Monsouri into mounting a production for her. It requires bel canto singing from an enthusiastic soprano. The Met’s version starred the rising star, Natalie Dessay. I’d never heard of her, but she was a strong independent woman, resembling Helen Mirren during her Merchant Ivory period with a resplendent voice. Natalie played the beautiful soprano Amina, who was engaged to marry Elvino, an easy-on-the-eyes tenor played by Juan Diego Florez. Elvino had jilted a gal named Lisa who appears prominently in the opening scene announcing her unhappiness and bitterness as the nuptials are getting underway. A mysterious stranger comes to town and Lisa quickly arranges a bed for him. She also ends up in the stranger’s bedroom, no doubt to turn down the pillow and leave a mint. As Angela Lansbury says in DEAR HEART, “You have no idea how helpful I can be to an out-of-towner!” The stranger and Lisa are alone in the room in the middle of the night….when they hear someone coming. Quick! The closet! Amina is walking in her sleep, muttering how much she’s in love with Elvino. She’s also singing high-C’s in her sleep. She’s not carrying a knife or any other kind of weapon, like Lady Macbeth and other sonnambulas I’ve known. Amina tucks herself into the bed of the hot mysterious stranger. I should mention that one of my facebook friends is a Sonnambula, too. He has been known to get up in the middle of the night, open a box of cereal and leave a path of it across the kitchen floor like crumbs in Hansel And Gretel. He’s been known to climb into bed with an out of towner. It was later attributed to medical side effects from some prescription drug, but it was the talk of the town for those in the know. I’m not naming names. I’m going on with the story….

     Of course Elviro finds out that his betrothed has been wandering into the village inn and uh sleeping around. But only sleeping. Elviro doesn’t believe it. Her name is mud. Which takes us into the grand finale of act one where everyone goes a little mad. Very beautiful singing. I felt like I died and had gone to heaven. Tears were actually streaming down my face. Of course I also cry at the end of a good episode of Desperate Housewives. I like to let out my emotions when I watch the arts, because I resist the temptation to do so at work.

Act two ensues, and the plot doesn’t exactly go where I want it to.Elviro proves to be a terrible sport about his fiancee’s alledged unfaithfulness, humiliating her in front of her friends, family and co-workers to the extent that I really wished Amino would marry the handsome stranger and live happily ever after with him. Or anyone else.   There’s some sneaky plans by Lisa that go unpunished. I didn’t write this opera, and it’s too late to fix the story line. The Met decided to tell the story by making the story happen concurrently with a backstage drama of an opera company putting on LA SONNAMBULA. The director must have been inspired by ARIADNE OBNOXIOUS, which had a backstage drama about a group of people putting on an opera. Or maybe it’s all due to KISS ME KATE. It’s not a new concept, but for this production, it works beautifully. I loved the fact that you felt you were watching LIVE, and very up-close! The camera might focus on someone else as opposed to who’s singing occasionally. Or that the leading soprano suddenly realizes she’s standing in the wrong place and hurriedly adjusts her position. Art isn’t perfection. There are backstage interviews with the stars, this time hosted by Deborah Voigt. There are surtitles at the bottom to follow the plot, but not to encourage those of us with coloratura voices who think this is the Sing-A-Long Mamma Mia! I had a wonderful time and can’t wait for the next outing!!